PaRtY
by CBearTddy
Summary: Lots and lots of people get killed okay, is that enough to get your atention? but's not what the party is about.
1. EASY BAKE COOKIES

-Disclaimer-  
  
"I do not own~" *Gets cut off by the telephone*  
  
::ring, ring:: ::ring, ring::  
  
^-^' "Oh, no! It's my lawyer! I better say this quick before he gets mad!"  
  
"Um! I- I."  
  
::ring, ring::  
  
"I DO NOT OWN YU YU HAKUSHO!" *phone stops ringing*  
  
"For a second I thought that I was going DOWNTOWN." ::knock, knock:: *I open door*  
  
*a mob of angry lawyers stand with bats in their hands!*__"You're coming with us; we're taking you DOWNTOWN!"  
  
^-^' "Sure, hang on; I need to get something"__*I slam the door shut, take a deep breath, then start locking all twenty-five locks  
  
"Anywho, I think we should get started with the story before it's too late. This is my first fic. So it may be a little sloppy. Feel free to flame me!"  
  
*someone in the audience takes out a flamethrower*  
  
"Ahhhhhhhhhh!"  
  
(A/N: I fixed my story 'cuz the last one was really corny. Hope you like it!)  
  
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Ch. 1 EASY BAKE COOKIES  
  
Everyone gathers to Kurama's house to met his new friend, me! Kymara.  
  
*Kurama thinking: Don't worry! If anyone asks I have never met her!*  
  
Kymara: Well Anywho, I came over to PLAY and I'm going to make COOKIES! *laughs uncontrollably* HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA HAAA .  
  
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=five hours later=  
  
HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA HAAA HA HA HA!  
  
*takes a deep breath* WEEE! That was fun!  
  
*everyone waits impatiently* WHERE ARE THOSE COOKIES!  
  
Kymara: Oh yeah! I'll go make them! What kind of cookies do you all want?  
  
*all at once blurt out their favorite kind of cookie*  
  
Kurama: white chocolate  
  
Botan: sugar  
  
Hiei: M and M's  
  
Yukina: Oatmeal  
  
Yusuke: Chocolate chip  
  
Keiko: Raisin  
  
Shizuru: Almond  
  
*Kymara goes to make the cookies*  
  
::knock, knock::  
  
*Hiei gets the door, peaks out then closes it fast*  
  
Botan: who was it?  
  
Hiei: no one, just another stupid salesman.  
  
Kuwabara (on the outside of the door): Hey, Hiei let me in! I know you guys are in there; don't tell me that you are to eat all the cookies without me. COME ON! Let me in or I'll ~  
  
Hiei: or what? Use your Spirit Sword on me. HA! That's nothing compared to what my Black Dragon Wave can do to you.  
  
*everyone goes upstairs*  
  
* Kuwabara climbs in through an open upstairs window, clumsily*  
  
*Hiei walks toward Kuwabara and blows in his face*  
  
* Kuwabara covers his face with his hands, falls backwards out the window then lands on top of Kurama's garden*  
  
Kurama: OH NO MY FLOWERS!  
  
*everyone stares at him weird*  
  
Kurama: I mean tomatoes! Yeah! OH NO MY TOMATOES!  
  
Shizuru: Quick help me with this! He'll wake up any second!  
  
* Hiei pushes a couch out the window. It falls on Kuwabara and kills him*  
  
Yukina: You killed him *looks shocked* Oh well, I guess I better start arranging everything for his funeral ^-^ Come on Keiko lets go pick out a coffin... Keiko, Keiko!  
  
*Keiko and Yusuke come out of a closet with a sign on the door handle* Ummm. sorry I took so long. I was "busy".  
  
Yukina: Um HELLO, haven't you read the sign, it says five minuets only! You took ten! *grabs Keiko's hand and gives Yusuke an evil look*  
  
*Yukina and Keiko leave*  
  
Yusuke: well that went good  
  
Hiei: yeah real smooth, at least she didn't see that you forgot to zip up your fly or she would have gotten real mad, you know how she is when people get on her girl.  
  
Yusuke: Thanks for reminding me. ^-^'  
  
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=later=  
  
Kurama: *after thinking for a while* HEY wasn't that MY couch you pushed out the window!  
  
Hiei: ^-^' ummmmmmmm.  
  
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*Kymara walks in with a tray full of cookies* Hey everyone I finished baking the~  
  
*everyone attacks the tray*  
  
Kymara: MY COOKIES! ( *shrugs and dives in to join the crowd*  
  
Yusuke: Hey . MUNCH, MUNCH. these . MUNCH, MUNCH. are. MUNCH, MUNCH. actually . MUNCH, MUNCH. good *he says between mouthfuls* *cough* *Yusuke dies*  
  
Botan: Hey, um, what just happened?  
  
Kymara: Yusuke died.  
  
Botan: I know that! But how did he die?  
  
Shizuru: Who cares? All that matters know is who's going to bury his body.  
  
*Everyone stares at Kurama*  
  
Kurama: HELL NO! I'm not going to bury a dead body in my very own backyard!  
  
Kymara: Fine be that way! I guess that we'll just leave him there to rot.  
  
Everyone: Fine with us! *everyone continues to eat cookies*  
  
Botan: Who really killed him?  
  
*Hiei avoids eye contact*  
  
Botan: Hiei come on, I know it was you!  
  
*Hiei thinking: DARN IT HOW'D SHE KNOW!*  
  
Botan: THANK YOU!  
  
*Everyone smiles*  
  
Kymara: How did you kill him?  
  
Hiei: With nothing really, I just poisoned him with some of this poison I found in Kurama's bedroom.  
  
Kurama: THAT WASN'T POISON THAT WAS MY FERTILIZER!  
  
Hiei: You don't mean fertilizer as in~  
  
Kurama: No stupid! PLANT FERTILIZER!  
  
::twitch, twitch::  
  
Kurama: Grrrrrrrrr. THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEAN!  
  
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=later, after everyone finishes arguing about fertilizer, eating the cookies, and bringing Yusuke back to life because he was beginning to rot and smell bad (for those of you that do not know when people are dead for a while they start to smell)=  
  
Botan: Wow! You really know how to make cookies! What's your secret?  
  
Kymara: oh I just get these little cubes and put them in my Easy Bake Oven for about fifteen seconds.  
  
Shizuru: But you were in the kitchen for half an hour.  
  
Yusuke: What have you been doing in there? *he says suspiciously*  
  
Kymara: Um well. DON'T COME IN! *blocks the kitchen door*  
  
*everyone walks closer and closer*  
  
Kymara: ^-^' What are you going to do to me?  
  
*everyone starts tickling Kymara*  
  
Kymara: NOOOO! He he he he. Ha ha ha ha ha. Okay, okay! You can come in.  
  
*Kurama opens door*  
  
Everyone: WOW! CAKE! *start running towards the cake*  
  
Kymara: WAIT!  
  
*everyone freezes*  
  
Kymara: We forgot to sing happy birthday to the birthday boy!  
  
*everyone falls anime style*  
  
Kurama: You remembered my birthday?  
  
Hiei: Wasn't your birthday three months ago?  
  
Kurama: Oh yeah. DARN!  
  
Yusuke: Then if it's not Kurama's birthday who's is it?  
  
Kymara: The birthday boy is-  
  
TIME FREEZE!!!!  
  
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A/N: Ha ha ha. I cliff-hanged you! (*cough* not really. I just got tired of typing, *shush* don't tell any one)  
  
So, what did you think of my first chapter? I brought my fire extinguisher just in case you flame me ^-^.  
  
~LYL~ Kymara 


	2. ALL HAIL THE KING

Ch. 2 ALL HAIL THE KING  
  
Heyo!  
  
This second chapter will have my vbf (very best friend), Tori (gothicvampireprincess) as Saya; Poo is also going to be in it. I LUV POO! Everyone who luvs Poo say Poo! POO! Ummm. sorry about that. And people don't steal my king idea *cough (Tori)*.  
  
Tori stole my idea! Waaaaaaaaaaaaa! *sniffle*  
  
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FROZEN  
  
REWIND  
  
UNFREEZE  
  
Yusuke: Then if it's not Kurama's birthday, who's is it?  
  
Kymara: The birthday boy is. POO!  
  
*everyone falls anime style*  
  
Shizuru: Don't tell me we have to sing happy birthday to Poo!  
  
*Saya appears* it's KING POO, not poo!  
  
Everyone: King?  
  
Saya: Yeah king. Me and Kymara stole a, I-I- mean BOUGHT Poo a crown and he became king.  
  
*Poo appears* poo, poo, poooo, poo, poo.  
  
*translator appears* poo says; bow down to me for I have arrived, I AM THE KING!  
  
Yusuke: WHAT!?! Now don't tell me that we're going to have to follow orders from a stupid, blue, bird!  
  
::TWACK:: *Kymara hits Yusuke on the head with the cookie tray* *it knocks him out*  
  
Kymara and Saya: Stupid, that's not what he said *yells at translator* tell the truth!  
  
Translator: Okay, okay! *sigh* did you finish backing the cakes. *he says in a boring tone*  
  
Kymara: YEP! I finished all the cakes!  
  
Saya: ALL 37 FLAVORS!?! *she says while wiping the drool of her chin*  
  
*everyone else notices that the have drool on their chin, too, wipes it of with their sleeves*  
  
*Saya unrolls a red velvet carpet* OH NO!!! I forgot the traditional "happy birthday chair"  
  
Kymara: Don't worry Saya. I always bring my portable one. DU-TA-RAN. *takes out a rolly-chair*  
  
*Yusuke gets back up* Hey that isn't the birthday ch~  
  
::TWACK:: *Kymara hit's him on the head again*  
  
*the really slow Kurama* hey isn't that MY rolly-chair!  
  
Saya: Grrrrr.  
  
Kurama: UM. never mind. I-I think that I'm mistaken. -_- ;  
  
Botan: Wow! Just look at her! She looks like she's about to jump out at him!  
  
Kymara: she doesn't jump; she pounces.  
  
::POUNCE::  
  
*Kurama screams for dear life* AAHHHHHHHH~ Botan: WOW! LOOK AT THAT. What-what- is she. doing?  
  
Kymara: eating.  
  
Everyone: EWWW! -  
  
*Saya gets up and wipes Kurama's blood off her face with the sleeve of her blue jacket*  
  
(A/N: Kurama is still alive, okay. I don't want to kill him yet. I just wanted to make him suffer. He he he.)  
  
Saya: YUCK! GROSS! Blood too pure, too much kindness, need evilness. *leeches on to Hiei*  
  
Hiei: aw~ WHAT THE FUCK! AHHHH! GET OFF! GET OFF!  
  
(A/N: Saya is part vampire. k. that will help you understand the blood sucking.)  
  
::SLURP::  
  
Hiei: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU!  
  
Saya: umm, umm. *looks around, Kymara passes her the cookie tray*  
  
::TWACK:: *hits Hiei on the head*  
  
Saya: That's better. Anyone else want to know what I am? Anyone.  
  
....  
  
*Hiei gets up, doesn't remember anything, and is loony*  
  
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=later after everyone sings happy birthday to Poo=  
  
*Poo blows on the candles, blows nothing but air*  
  
Poo: poo, poo, poo, poo, pooo!  
  
Yusuke: ALL RIGHT! WHO THE HELL FORGOT THE CANDLES!  
  
*half eaten Kurama goes off to hide under the table*  
  
Kymara: Saya, didn't YOU have the candles?  
  
Saya: NO! I thought that you had them.  
  
Kymara: What!?! What made you think that?  
  
Saya: Well, DUH! You made the cakes!  
  
Grrrrr!! *both of the girls get ready to pounce*  
  
Shizuru: WAIT!  
  
*they freeze*  
  
Shizuru: We can use the candle that we were saving for Kuwabara *takes out a candle that reads "I'm a big boy now" *  
  
Kymara and Saya: That'll work.  
  
*places candle on cake*  
  
*Poo makes a wish and blows out the candle*  
  
::POP:: *Poo's wish comes true*  
  
*Koenma appears on those roasting sticks that go above a fire*  
  
Koenma: Hey what am I doing here? *glances a Kurama's body still hiding under the table* AHHH! DON'T TELL ME I'M GOING TO END UP LIKE KURAMA !?!  
  
Kymara: No. We've got something special planned for you.  
  
*everyone puts on an evil smirk*  
  
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A/N: Wasn't this chapter so evil. Who ever knew Poo COULD be evil?  
  
I know I said on my bio that I wouldn't post another chapter until I got five reviews, but I felt like posting this TODAY. And what I want needs to happen when I want it and where I want it or ALL HELL UNLEASHES! MUWAHAHAHAH!  
  
~Kymara 


	3. CHICKEN POT PIE

Ch 3. CHICKEN POT PIE (and soup)  
  
I know all you Kurama fans are all upset about chapter 2 but don't worry chapter 4, KURAMA'S REVENGE is on its way. Oh and just to warn you I was really, really mad and violent when I wrote most of this fic. BEWARE!  
  
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Brainwashed Hiei: YAY! Entertainment!  
  
Everyone: STUPID! YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL HIM OUR PLAN!  
  
Kymara: Oh well, I guess that now that he knows were gonna have to kill him.  
  
*Saya takes out a gallon of gas and a lighter*  
  
Kymara: NO! No gas! You don't want to but poison in our food.  
  
*Saya tosses the gas and takes out olive oil*  
  
Koenma: FOOD!?! You're going to eat me? *everyone nods* But-but I taste bad.  
  
Botan: Sure. that's what they ALL say! I know you're lying! You taste real good.  
  
(A/N: Ewww. *chill* *chill* Bad thoughts, bad thoughts)  
  
Koenma: Botan, shush! You're gonna get me eaten!  
  
Botan: DUH! When you go to cannibalistic ceremonies "people" get eaten!  
  
Koenma: Why am I gonna get eaten, can't you eat Kurama?  
  
Botan: No. We can't do that, he's plotting revenge. See.  
  
*Everyone looks toward the far corner where Kurama's busy plotting revenge*  
  
Kurama (too busy plotting revenge to notice everyone staring at him): .I'll trick her into doing this and then I'll corner her over here and then I'll do this and I'LL RIP OUT HER HEART! MUWAHAHAHA! .wait. she's a vampire, she doesn't have a heart.  
  
Saya: I'm a half vampire, stupid!  
  
Kurama: Does that mean you have half a heart?  
  
Saya: No.  
  
Kurama: Damn you! *mumbles* stupid vampires.  
  
--------------  
  
Koemna: Oookay. that was weird.  
  
Botan: Now do you see why we can't eat Kurama?  
  
Koemna: No, but if you say so.  
  
--------------  
  
Poo: Poo, poo, pooo, poo!  
  
Saya: Are you sure master? It is a hard dish to make without chicken. And plus, who ever heard of eating that at a birthday party?  
  
Poo: POO, POO!  
  
Saya: Um. *she says quickly* I'm so sorry master. I didn't mean to question your orders!  
  
*Saya starts her search for chicken. She spots Koemna*  
  
Hehe, Hehe.  
  
*she unties Koemna off his roasty thingy*  
  
Koemna: Why thank you Saya. If you hadn't untied me I would have soon become today's late night special. Um. Saya, why are we going to the kitchen? Um. Um. Ogre! HELP!  
  
--------------  
  
=Meanwhile at the spirit world=  
  
Ogre: Hum. *he scratches his head* did I hear something? *he shrugs and gets back to work*  
  
--------------  
  
=back to Kurama's house=  
  
Koemna (while being dragged): HELP! HELP! HELLLLP!  
  
WHAM! *the kitchen door hits him on the head and knocks him unconscious*  
  
Saya: Thank god! I thought he was never gonna shut up! Hum. What knife should I use? Hum. ALL OF THEM!  
  
Slice, slice, slice!  
  
Chop, chop, chop!  
  
Stab, stab!  
  
Yusuke: for some weird reason I don't want to go into the kitchen.  
  
Saya (in the kitchen): now all I need now is some thing to add some flavor.  
  
PUSH! *Yusuke gets pushed in* OPF! SPLATTER!  
  
Yusuke: Ewww! Gross! You could have at least tried to be clean when you chopped up pacifier breath. Wow, who would have known so much blood was in such a little guy? I could swim in this. Cool, I'm swimming. YAY!  
  
Saya: SHUT UP! You act like you haven't killed anyone in your life.  
  
Yusuke: Well umm. you see that's the thing. well, how do I say this. I get PAYED by these Japanese producers to "act" like I'm killing people and then the rest is just ketchup.  
  
Saya: ohh. okay, in that case I'll kill you cuz I like killing people rather then "act" like I kill. *cough (and also cuz I ran out of chicken)* so ummm. DIE!  
  
SPLATTER!  
  
--------------  
  
=after a while=  
  
Saya (calls out to Kurama): Hey, Kurama! I hope you don't mind if I borrow your stove and your easy back oven!  
  
Kurama: a matter a fact I DO!  
  
Saya: too bad then I already used them! *Saya opens the kitchen door, everyone who was listening through the door fall in*  
  
Saya: get up everyone you can lye on the floor later cuz right nows dinner time! Oh and Botan.  
  
Botan: yeah.  
  
Saya: could you make Yusuke's and Koemna's ride back to the spirit world a bumpy one.  
  
Botan: as long as you save me some chicken! *Botan grabs her oar and soars out the window*  
  
Saya: yeah right. Like I'm gonna save her some chicken.  
  
*Saya takes out a huge pot of chicken soup and a chicken pot pie*  
  
Saya: Kurama, the pie is for you; it's a way of me saying I'm sorry for eating part of you.  
  
Kurama: Why thank you Saya. And all this time I thought you were~ OWW! YOU BITCH! YOU DROPPED THE SPOON ON MY TOE! I'VE HAD IT WITH! YOU HAVE TO DIE NOW!  
  
Saya: oh how are you going to that if I'm HALF VAMPIRE!  
  
Kurama: WITH THIS! *takes something out of his pocket*  
  
*everyone gasps*  
  
Saya: AHHHH!  
  
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A/N: Cliffy! Muwahahahahahahaha! I told you this chapter was a little more violent than my other chapters. You Kurama fans must be happy that Kurama's gonna get his revenge. Hehe, Hehe, bi Saya!  
  
~Kymara 


End file.
